How To Stop Worrying And Start Living Summary

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How To Stop Worrying And Start Living Summary by Mind Map: How To Stop Worrying And Start Living Summary

1. 1-Sentence-Summary:

1.1. How To Stop Worrying And Start Living is a self-help classic which addresses one of the leading causes of physical illness, worry, by showing you simple and actionable techniques to eliminate it from your life.

2. Favorite quote from the author:

2.1. "Let's not allow ourselves to be upset by small things we should despise and forget. Remember: Life is too short to be little." - Dale Carnegie

3. 3 lessons:

3.1. Clear confusion with a 3-step approach and you’ll eliminate the worry it causes.

3.1.1. When you’re worried you’re not busy doing things, but since taking action is the only thing that can improve your situation, every minute spent worrying is a minute that doesn’t make your life better.

3.1.2. The biggest cause of worry is confusion. We never know what’s going to happen next and it drives us insane.

3.1.3. Use this three-step approach to deal with it: Get your facts straight by writing down what you know and what you’re worried about. Analyze those facts to figure out your options. Make a decision and stick to it.

3.1.4. An example:

3.1.5. There’s nothing like some good old common sense to disarm your worries.

3.2. Put a stop-loss on the things in your life that cause you stress, grief and anxiety.

3.2.1. One thing that’s crucial when applying the above strategy is timing.

3.2.2. If you spend all of your time analyzing the facts and trying to make a decision, until the thing you’re worried about actually happens, you won’t have won much.

3.2.3. That’s where a time limit can help. To implement this, you can adapt an idea from trading and investing: the stop-loss. A stop-loss is used to limit your financial downside. For example, if you buy 200 stocks for $10 and set your stop-loss at $8, your trading software will automatically sell all of your stocks if they fall to $8 or below, ensuring your maximum total loss is capped at $400 ($2*200).

3.2.4. If something causes you stress, grief or anxiety, like a friend picking a fight over a stupid topic, a relationship falling apart or your boss telling you you did a bad job, put your foot down and set a limit. Say “this far, and not one step further, am I going to allow myself to worry about this.”

3.2.5. This can be a time-limit or a general rule, like Hal Elrod’s 5-minute rule or a guideline to forgive others instantly after a fight, instead of holding grudges.

3.3. Think of criticism as compliments, instead of obsessing about negative feedback.

3.3.1. Not all criticism is constructive. You have to be careful in deciding who to listen to, and who to ignore.

3.3.2. One thing you can do with all criticism though, is take it as a compliment. 90% of the time, people throw around their opinions to make them feel better about themselves, because they see you doing something right and are threatened by it. We always critique those we envy, so we can feel better by comparison, not so they can do a better job.

3.3.3. If anything, the more you’re being criticized, the more you know you’re doing something right.

3.3.4. So hear their comments, nod, thank them, take it as indication you’re on the right track, and if there’s no constructive feedback in it, just move on.

4. What else can you learn from the blinks?

4.1. Which kind of diseases stress causes

4.2. What’s even more important than making a decision

4.3. How “daytight compartments” can help you stay in the present

4.4. The 3-step approach that saved one guy from dying of a bad disease

4.5. How one woman started loving life in the desert, even though she didn’t move there voluntarily

4.6. Why you should never expect gratitude

4.7. How wanting to be someone else makes you miserable

4.8. What counterintuitive approach quadrupled worker productivity in a steel factory

4.9. The best way to avoid stress in your life altogether

5. Who would I recommend the How To Stop Worrying And Start Living summary to?

5.1. The 24 year old startup founder, who’s worried about the next round of investor pitches every night, the 55 year old who knows her marriage isn’t making her happy any more, and anyone who obsesses about criticism.